Man....I keep losing the ability to understand, no, i understand perfectly, care and act on things. And i cant find much value in anything once again.

I guess it is cause in the end I've lost communication with everyone...

And then i get complacent, and hurt more.

But you know, the worst, I am obsessed with that damn dream girl. Every other freaking thought drifts to her. And i know she is not real, i know i will never meet her, i know nothing i do matters for her...yet i remember the small portions of that dream...feel so enticed, so in Like, like i have found a chance...

But god dammit. That wont happen.

And while stuck on the thought of someone who wont exist, i hurt others.

Man. I gotta admit. This is a new loop, never quite been down this road before...

Gah...