I realized for some reasons that damn old fear is back. Fear of getting hurt. Getting close, etc is back. With most everyone. I have been trying to...tone it down, not be as close to everyone recently. Odd.
I guess i am feeling torn mostly over who I am. Am i really the weak inferior person i always feel like when depressed? Or am i truly the strong, unmovable, unharmable person i try to be. Most likely the former. But still i find myself refusing to care. If it hurts me, or makes me uncomfortable, laugh it off and ignore. I don't let myself cry in others if i would feel like it, if i would feel sick or harmed i usually try to act as if it was nothing. I try to be like someone who has no weakness, i talk big, and act big, and try to be superman. When i am just a man. How damn odd.
*yawns* Hmm. But i am not sad or angry or anything really. This is an odd musing after waking up....I wanna go perma-nap.
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1 comment:
Dude. Seriously. It's like ur copying me. But I won't tell you why I think that. Because you might not know
but seriously
if you aren't copying me
then the irony
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