Such elation.

God, christmas, new years, all this, i love it, i take all the emotion, it flows through me, it is an indescribable ectasy. I love it. Happy new year all. Lets make this decade kick some serious ass.

Me and louies new year resolution: Do something as epic as jecht.

I won't do too much. But a happy new years.

So. A crapload happened. I lost friends, and i refound them. All those friends i was just friends with, i became close to. Lost it with other friends. Hell, i learned love, learned hate, learned depression, quit trying and left it to fate. Lost my friend, regained them in the end. Came to love a new daughter/niece/wife, and i found the love of my life. BEcame a better person, became a worse person, learned to control myself, and lost all control. Became best friend with those i hated, learned to love them, and feel elated. Had my ups, had my downs. Saw many smiles, and just as many frowns. tried and make amends, especially with lost friends.

God so much happened. I loved it all. I hated it too. But i was there with all of you. Heh. You all know how i feel, you know what i think, so i am not doing one of the big explanations on everyone. I let you all know often. But i thank you all, i have found great friends in you. So here is to another year, and i hope i find friends in you still, all of you, and know that all of you, every single one, will find a friend in me.

Take this! My love, my hate, and all of my sorrow!

Actually. don't. I have been thinking a lot recently. So many things reminding me about trying to lose memories. Forget pain. And i realized, I have found something i truly fear. And it is losing those memories, the pain, the hate, the rage, the love, the joy, the lust, the sorrow, the deceit, the everything. It has shaped me so much. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger...It takes me a while. But i push past this all and i become stronger. No. I become more adept, i learn not to be serious. I grow. Learn those mistakes, learn the successes. If i gave up, quit, forgot it all, then i would not have the love of Emily. I would not be friends, and the closest friends, with Alex. I would not have my amazingly wonderful and badass daughter. If i didn't just try, if i didn't wish for old memories, if i just quit then laura would never have started hanging with our friends again after she left. I would never have fallen in love, and had that love lost, i would never have felt that hate, and never repaired it to a great friendship again. If i never made that small push to talk to miguel i would not be friends with him. If i didn't push to get to know that quiet kid i would not have ben as a friend. If i didn't push over and over to get to know those three girls who were freaked out by me i would never know molly, or jess, or Emily.

How can i ever consider giving up or forgetting these memories! How can i be anything but thankful for everything, even the bad. From it all i have become a good person. God damnit i have worked hard, i have changed so much in the years, i have found love, beauty, and everything, i have gained control i thought stupid years ago, i gained morals, i learned caution and empathy, i learned to feel! These emotions, these experiences, if anything, I want more. I want to feel so much more, i want to have my life crafted more. I want the diversity and amazingness.

And with this said. I can't give up on my old friends. Clint, Bren, Scott, they are still available. I can salvage them. God damnit I won't quit, even if it is small jokes, occasionally asking pointless questions, just trying to be a friend. I won't give up. and i will help Alex, and Louie, and all my friends. With this thought, i have found my serenity, my peace, my balance, my nirvana, i can keep it. I can try and spread it.

*concedes* I love you daughter~

I realized it from your realization

>.>

I have come to the realization. Harley Quinn is always hot.

http://images2.fanpop.com/images/photos/7300000/Harley-Quinn-in-Arkham-Asylum-Videogame-batman-7340341-1024-768.gif

Playing the demo made me realize she was creepily hot. Which intrugies and disturbs me. *looks down there* What the fuck is up with you stupid organ. I don't understand you.

Yes. I made a whole blog for this purpose. Hey. Good break from depression/post depression blogs eh?

carpe diem...

when did i forget that. go with the flow. that is what i need. hell. all relationshis, all of everything has its stumbles and doubts. emily and alex, time, it will fix those. me and alex are better, and i refuse to believe me and em can goo all the way to hell so easily and quick. Breathe. i am happy. i know control. give it time and those relationships will fix themselves. Calm. i love them. and hell i still love bren even. i just have to keep my cool. not push too hard, not be spiteful. go with the flow, let time heal all wounds. laura, alex, emily, are getting better each day. they can be healed...maybe even me and bren... but its obvious he does not care for me.oh well.

Breathe in, breathe out.

I need to calm. I need to stop lashing out, saying the wrong thing, and doing all this stupid shit. I need to stop the sabotage. Calm myself. Use meditation of old. I need to gain control over my emotions and stop leting them use me. Stop letting them rampantly control me. I need to block them, control them. I had that brilliant apathy and distance, i can regain and use that to calm myself. I have dealt with worse. I need to stop letting everyone elses crap make me paranoid and make me paranoid and overreact. In a week or so everything will be noraml and good. I know this. I wont let emotions fuck me over. I have control of them. Breathe in. Breathe out. Clear mind. Life will be fine.

delicious irony

its the most wonderful time of the year, everythings failing, friendships are fading, romance is waning, sanity is failing, depressions are coming, oh for all its the most wonderful time of the year

onward to depression.

lets see. bren hates me. alex and i seem less close and as if it is unrepairable. my rrelationship seems to be going to hell and i can see all the signs of me getting dumped there. i feel as if everything i do is wrong. oh and i now am paranoid and feel like i am slipping back to my sabootage everything state as a defense. i also can tell i am starting to seal away emotions, causing me to overdo everything to prevent that from happening. i feel like everyone is gone and i cant talk to them at all. i feel abandoned. i gave everyone gifts and the only one to thank me was whitney. hell i think she thanked me for emily's gift when emily did not. oh. grades are slipping when i felt good about them. and i feel sick. and everyone expects me to open up to them whhen they wont do it for me. heh. its taking a lot to keep self out of depression...aint christmas a grand time.

I've got a lot to say. Honestly. But won't say too much.

Bren. I will address you first. So i can keep the balls to do this. Since i refuse to be a coward. Okay. I don't know if you even read this. But here. I still love you, you still have my interest, even if i despise you at this moment. A lot. But I refuse to take back anything i said. I refuse to pretend i was wrong. Because if you have a sense of logic, you will know i had a right to say it. But here. I will leave this to you, because we know i would try to fix all this shit if i had any shred of possiblity. But if you want to keep our friendship, in any way, hell, any friendship with any of us, here is the simple way. Something we would all adhere to with ease. Just talk to us. Nothing big. It is quite easy. Talk as if none of this happened. Just be our friend again. We can act as if it didn't. Who cares. But if you want to be our friend do it. And even if you don't want to be with alex, or you don't want any closeness like you and i had, don't try for that, but stay our friend. And God damnit. I know, i know that you still feel for alex in someway, and emily, and the others, at least as friends, your showing subtle signs i know how to pick up, even if you and others don't. So be their friend. Please. I don't care if you be a bitch to me, treat me like shit, because i know you hate me, even if you don't realize it, i will take that, but don't torture the others and yourself. They all want to be your friend, and you want to be theirs. And if the cost is me giving up the friendship i once had, so be it.

To whitney: I could tell you a lot, cause dear god, i have talked about that so much over the years. But i will be short and sweet. You know how i feel, you know you can always come to me.

To myself:

God...Today i realized how bad i have it for emily...When did i start trying to make taylor move so i can sit by the girl, rather than him make me? When did it go that i was actually sad, and hating being somewhere, when i thought the girl was not going to be there. God. When emily and the band people came to the show...I felt great seeing her. What happened to me... Heh. I am so whipped...

And i realized something today. Which i forgot. Oops. It was some big introspective thing...hehe >.>

Uhm. I super wrapped emily's gift. whole wrapping paper tube, then i super taped >.>

And dear god. New reborn chapter is sexy. Though Ghost...PUT CLOTHES ON MAN.

So i went to one piece to cheer up...

NOW I AM MORE DEPRESSED D: AWESOME PEOPLE WHY D:

Not diggin this day at all.

Bah. So Whit and JEnni got in fight with Destiny, it really killed seeing them so...broke. So i hugged them, and kissed their forehead, barely spoke, just tried to make them feel better. And i realized, i treat them like i do my cousins to a degree, xD that is how i console my cousins, hug them, kiss their head (though with some i do that because they are adorable or it pisses them off xD) and just tell them kind words. Wow. I really would be like a good dad/uncle person...

Then math i had a quiz, when no other period did. And they got to play games -_- And i have not understood this chapter. So i failed.

Barely escaped showing vocab in social studies. Did a quick memorization five minutes before. Hopefully i did good, i really really need to up my grade to exempt.

Then i need talent show ticket. Dunno if i still can get. and half my friends are goin to the study hall or some band thing. So i feel alone all ready. Which really sucks. Wanted to hang with everyone since i barely see them, especially em. Bah.

Dunno if i am going to tays cause family is seeing avatar.

Really just want to hang with Whit, Em, Kasha, Ben, and Tay, all the others too. But them a lot. Dunno why so specific, well, Whit and Em its obvious, same with others. I guess.

I now have realized that somehow kasha became one of my closest friends recently, like heading to level of Alex/Whit/Em/Ben/Tay.

Bah i just feel really shitty and sad right now...Not even in a way that makes sense. Specially since i was on top of the world. I wo- I KNOW WHY. I always get like this when i have school the last few days before a break. Ah ha. I will sleep later. Sleep always helps...

No one will read one piece T_T Still sad about that.

Oh. We had to dance in Spanish. I really didn't. I kinda wanted to, but also just liked watching... I bet if i was just with friends i would have but oh well.

BAH. I just want this week over. It sucks -_-

And did i mention i have no rootbeer -_- God. I really hate this day.

I REMEMEBERED

OFFICIAL ACTUALL HAPPY JAPAN FFXIII RELEASE

uhm. Uhm.

I had something cool to say. But forgot.

So all that happened was that i scared both kasha and quiet girl. Epic win.

Thanks for the remindeder Katzy~

New chapter of Soul eater was fucking brilliant. We must talk about it, cause i am confused xD

And to all who care. I made a sexy Lego plane, it is awesome looking. I need a terrorist lego person. MUHAHAHAHA

Lack of title, don't take it too hard, somethin. Dunno, fail title.

Let me get one thing straight. Alex. I was, and still am slightly pissed, but i really don't blame you, and i am not gonna let this ruin our whole fuckign friendship. If it is gonna get ruined, that is up to you. But i still love you, and don't think for one second i would let one SMALL mistake ruin everything.

Emily. I realized this most deeply last night, so sorry for not opening up. But in all honesty i never realize this crap till i am typin. And half of what i type is just an outlet to get it out of me. And i just had an old spot hit, and the old stuff, i really just don't talk about with anyone, since i have almost gotten past it all. A lot of it is thanks to you. I love you, a lot, and you have helped me so much with everything. Thank you.

Bren...Well. I have nothing to say to you. Everything i said. You fucking deserved it. You deserved every word, every bit of sadness any normal human would feel. But like hell you feel it i bet. Heh. Kinda ironic. Early on me and alex have been struggling to come to terms with our humanity, and now at least we can admit we feel. At least we can talk about how we feel, but what about you? No one around here knows you at all. You are just a small little machine, hell, cleverbot is easier to talk to, learn about, and half the time show personality. Heh. I feel a little bad for alex and emily. But for you, i feel no compassion. I have had this same scene play out so often, guess what, you are the one actor in these scenes that never changes, and gets lost. Good luck with life, you will need it.

And Katzy, well. Actually. Thanks. Haha. I don't blame you for most anythin, not talkin to me often, or anything like that. I won't lie and say we are the godliest friends ever, but you are fun to talk to, and a good friend. And you can always make me smile. Haha.

But to everyone. I refuse to apologize. Bren deserved everythign i said. Alex, i was a jackass, but it needed to be said so we can stay friends and keep on growing as friends, if we left all these issues alone it will end badly, i have seen it happen. And to everyone, i did direct a lot of stuff at you, and some was in anger, but it was all stuff i deserve to say. Because i will not change for anyone, will not bend for anyone. Heh. I did this for Bren, for Clint, for laura, for scott, hell. I won't go down that road again. And everything i said i was in the right to say. I won't say not to take it personally, though some should not, but don't think any of that applys just to alex, or just to em, or ben, or Whit, because it all has applied to everyone i know. And it is who i am. And i won't change for others. I was born alone, will die alone, and cherish the connections with others, but in the end i am with me, shaping me, building me, so i wont change myself for others. I love you all (bren exception) though, in a non-romantic way (Emily exception), and i do hope i did not cause too much pain. But i deserve to have said all i did. And only one who should be really hurt and take it all incredibly personally is Bren. The rest of you, just don't try and ruin my values, and shrug the rest off as mostly angry rant.

And in other news, i felt really crappy today >.> Need to catch up on sleep and food xD school will be a bitch catching up...

And in other news working on christmas gifts today~ Someone give me whitneys shirt size...

And i need to get Oh Well, Two Hears Beat, I won't Apologize, LDN, Smiles, and Bourgeois Shangri-la as mp3s....

also, a day late but.... HAPPY JAPAN RELEASE OF FFXIII *parties*

Or it is in two days... FALSE ALARM

I had an amazing day yesterday, but something clicked, and i am about to break...

Here. Before i cuss half of this out. Lets get some good.

I went to the Regionals, jolly good fun even when i got my ass kicked. I came to get really close to connan. Got stuff i needed and had fun.

And i jumped on ben, he just continued walking as i dragged behind. It hurt. whitney did a jump hug, first time hurt us both, second time was a success.

Now here is the rest:

Here is what i realized yesterday that killed me, horribly. I was letting myself get close to someone. And now. After all this shit i am in a ton of pain. I am not bothering to text or talk to anyone. Sitting on aim for them to talk to, but not going out of my way. And honestly i want to cry. But guess the fuck what all of you, guess what. I am holding to those promises i made to myself. I am changing. I am not letting my pain, and all of that harm me to the point where i hurt others, i am not burdening others to the point that it does nothing but harm them. I am keeping the balance. I am becoming a better person. I am keeping all of my fucking promises i have made and chronicled, even if half of you haven't and can't. And even if i want to cry so badly at the moment, i refuse. Never again will i shed a tear over something like this.

Here, lets give you your own part, a big part. Because i have wanted to address this for so long. But you know what, i wanted to try and succeede just personally doing it, because you know, i have changed a lot of things without addressing the problems specifically, working in small steps. But last week i was pushed over the edge. Cept i got no time to do anything and really confront you. Not that it would matter since you don't even talk to me anymore. Bren.

Who the fuck do you honestly think you are. Honestly? Here, what was it you said? "Do you think brandon would block me?" Honestly you ask that? You use to be my best friend, you use to know me, you use to know my past and you ask this shit? and notice i say "use to", because now i doubt it a lot. But here let me give you a big big big big big refresher on why i can easily block you in an instant. Clint. Remember him? I use to talk about him a lot. Talked to me when he felt like it, nad only then. Treated me like crap, used me, ignored me often, only reason i spoke to him was due to our past and a small wanting to make our frienship work again, while i am struggling with a growing hatred. Hey, sounds familiar.

Guess what bren, in all honesty i fucking hate your guts. Do you notice i have made one or two jokes at most with you in the weeks you have been back, tied emily to random things what, once? Well guess the fuck what, Clint, Blake, Scott, Laura, Laura greenawalt, Raj, Cory, so many others, they have all burned me, burned me really fucking bad. Do you think that "Oh hey i disappear like 4 months then come back, love me again?" is gonna happen. Hell. I was one of your best friends, you even said me, phil, and louie where your best friends. And guess what, only two of those three you talked to these past months. Heh. I was finally getting happy, but still having some issues, especially with not having any really close friends. And you abandoned me, do you think i would shrug it off and anything would be the fucking same, really? Hell, i am giving you a small bit of our past, adn trying to recover this frinedship to the small bit that i recovered with Laura Sooy and Clint, but it will never be like before. And all we had is gone. The Gods, the tieing, all that shit. You left me when i really needed a friend, you left me and then talked to phil and louie when i was supposedly one of your best friends. Like we can ever be close.

Oh. And don't think i don't realize that you blame me for all this shit. God i know you do. But just come out and say it. Oh wait. You won't cause i have to send fifteen damn messages to get one. Heh. You obviously hate alex, and you had a convo long enough to think she sent you to the ignore and get really pissed at each other, yet i can't get you to talk at all. You are a grade A douche bag. Oh and you know how close i was to you, i would time nad time again bend myself, break my morals, and change, without a moments notice, or even a thought. Do you know how fuckign lucky you really are, you had a friend who would forgo everything thta he was, his entire essence, and do anything he could to help you, do you know how rare a friend like that is? Well, if you didn't before, you don't know now. Heh. I hope you know how pathetic and small you are. And how you won't harm me ever again. And trust me, fuck up or act out a little more, be as malicious as last week, i will ignore you in an instant.

Oh. And alex, stop being a fucking bitch about this. I encouraged bren with a joke. Yeh fucking right. I never make a joke of encouragement. My jokes are small ways to try and stop something. And be pissed at me for a lot of things, i can't blame you. But know this. God damnit know this well. I love you a lot. You are my closest friend, but i have a few fucking morals i won't fucking budge on. And one of them is i won't take sides when both are at fault. And Guess what, bren may have been worse all these months, and if you start an argument there you have me, but last week both of you took the offensive instantly, bren was not the only one to attack, you did too. And then you get pissed because i did not side with you, and i stayed out of it because i was a coward, well, the others may not have done anything, and honestly they where being cowards. But for me, louie and phil, but mostly me, think past your own fucking universe. I have known bren for what, 4, 5 years? Same with them. And we have known you only a year or two. And i will speak only for myself, since i have not talked to them. But i have been dealing with my views on bren, and i still am friends to a good degree, even if he is pushing it a lot. And with you, i hated you, and had an awful past for half out time knowing each other. Do you honestly think it will be super easy to go either way against two of my best friends in all of my life, really? God, why not have me try and choose between Atheism adn Christianity too. But god, know this. You both attacked. You where not the holiest there, nor the evilist. And know this, god know it well or i will forget you like i am now forgetting bren each day. Actually. Everyone know this.

I will not bend myself for any of you. I will not choose between any of you. Do not try and make me choose, do not try to make me something else. If i promise Ben i am hanging with him i won't blow him off for anyone, not even Em or Daughter. If i promise i won't tell something i won't. And if someone is doing something wrong or misguided i will go against them. Even with my loves such as whit, or em, or you know, alex. No exceptions.

Oh, and before you try to accuse me of something alex. Do you know how i have defended you so many times, against phil, against em, against everyone. I fought to the death cause i know how you felt. God. And you bitch me out because i refuse to choose and bend my morals, you know, i realize it sucks a lot, and i really can't feel much anger, nothing compared to what i type right now, but try and think to how i feel, i have lost too many friends, i lost bren. And then you, my closest non-daughter, non-ro/bro-mance friend, go and bitch at me when i have been trying so hard to help you, side with you, and make things better fro you. And you act as if you shouldn't even talk to me over this, yeh, making it seem as if i am losing another friend... you know, thanks a lot, great way to repay me after you have said i helped a ton this last month. Thanks a lot.

Also. To all of you. Not just them. I have heard almost all of you have talked about me behind my back. If you guys have issues. Fucking tell me to myself. I am a big boy, and i have solved so much when people actually fucking talk. So none of you call me a fucking coward. Cause you know what, at least if i am annoyed with you i will say it here. Or try to talk to you. But guess what, i can handle anything any of you say.

And honestly. Everyone. I am sorry. But i am giving up for a little bit. I know it is hypocritical. But i need a break. I am done trying to help everyone on everything, i try and do this, and almost always you guys bite me in the ass. Emily, tell louie not to go to me unless it is really bad, and apologize for me. But i have finally found happiness. A real happiness. And after 3 or 4 years of constant depression and greif trying to solve everything, and be a pillar is breaking me, and i want to preserve this damn happiness. And it is fucking greedy, but guess what. All of you have done it, despite what all of you say. You have all forgone others chance at happiness to preserve yours, and tried to not lose your happiness. Alex, emily, whit, bren, jess, everyone. and you know what, you all have talked about how you deserve it after hells and trials. Well guess what. 4 years, numerous suicide attempts, oh god so damn many, and many of thousands of times where i almost killed myself with surefire ways, well. If i have to forgo helping others, and i have to be selfish so i can hold onto my damned happiness i have wanted and needed so long, then i will. Cause guess what. If i crack once more i won't be posting a "i almost did it" Like alex has (which i can't blame, the ideas are so romantic in a dark way), or like i use to. I can guarentee this will be all i have to say, "I can't take it. I am going with a permanant way. Be it cutting wrists, or a shot to the head. But i am done" And it will end that day. So i am sorry to all. But i am keeping my happiness. My life.

And since you all need to know this, you all make so many promises like i do, but you all keep to so few, and by god don't say i don't. Look at mine, i cuss a good bit less, i am making way less jokes, i am caring about feelings, and trying to watch my words, and respect others ideas, i am doing so much i never did. I fucking changed over these years, i became fucking human. Now how about you, no, how about the whole fucking world grows up. and i hope somehow some of you fucking get better through the end of all of this. I hope you all find happiness, and the balance that has taken many years, and almost taken my life, to find. and i hope you guys can find happiness, and like i do look beyond the outer of everything, beyond the pain, and find the good with every bad. Cause guess what.

I would not change one thing. Not the pain of getting my heartbroken, the pain of losing any friends, or of this. None. Goodbye. Good night.

Mirror force finally came

after 3 months -_-

And not true poppet

it was

*called back*

Me: yo
You:hey
*random small talk while i try to figure hidden motive of you actually calling back*
You: Heh, i am such an idiot *mumbled*
Me: *confused, getting base idea but not why it is being said now*
You: I don't know, well i do, but don't wanna talk about it.
Me:Okay...
*more random gabbing for like half an hour, and some small talking of evil ploys*

And nothing happened today really...

...Two more songs to my addictive listening >.>

Oh well by fleetwood mac and Two Hearts Beat by U2 are added to my list, along with lily Allens "its not me its you" album. And Smiles, and LDN from her too. >.>

And Poppet, you never said thank you~ You just said "i'm an idiot" and avoided talkin about it poppet. But how you said it conveyed all that you meant, but i won't say you're welcome. It seems so...Final and pointless if i do. And i know you will be here, and be my friend, for a long time to come. And you know that if you need help, or to talk i am always here. And don't think for an instant i don't understand, or won't have gone through it, cause trust me poppet, i have, i still am at times. And i can help you through the hell. I am a constant visitor there, and i have gone through and back often. And even if you can't, cause by god i know it is painful to consider, to act on, to try, remember that i am here for ya, remember that i know how it feels, and even when you are pushing people away, and irrationally hate people for trying to get to you when it is what you want, that i know how you feel, and i, no, all of your friends are still here for ya in the end. And your my best non-bromantic-romantic-daughter friend, and i love ya~

And woot excuse to make a non lazy blog. xD

Le sigh.

so nothing happened today. Did pathetically simple tests. Oh well, it was actually really relaxing.

And Demonic winds make Emily sadistic.

Finding myself bored and sad without alex.

And i am obsessed with Lily Allen. It is unhealthy... I love her so much though D: She is hot, she is insane, she is british, she can sing great, she can dance amazingly, and is british! She is pure win.

Ugggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I have to go to career center and take a stupid test to tell me what i am good at -_- While missing a day of tests i will have to make up -_- And missing math. And other shit. This is all so stupid. -_-.

And there was a mroe challenging project given to us in comp sci. I think i got it down. My design pwned it. Oh yeh.

Hrm.

Finished Codex last week. Great series. A must read. Codex Alera, jim Butcher.

Urhm. KAsha replaced by a new girl. Like emily was.

Been obsessive about lily allen.

Hating how much of life is going. Worried bout shit. Yet over-ecstatic.

Might go to Regs on sunday...Dear god i hope so...

Urhm. REading 13 reasons why, its okay. Not the second coming of christ as everyone has made it out to be. Though super short. The average page is like a 5th a normal book page. Or i read outrageous books. *thinks about Atlas* okay probably second. But i have read bout hour nad a half and am halfway through.

Uhm. Bored. Not much to do.

Hating how i know everything some people are going through, and i went through it, but still can't help.

Hating Daughter beign sick D:

Nomming saint nick candy. And uhm, nuthin else

Story time story time~

So far:

go The sun was slowly setting down as a car pulled up in front of the Meowzorz’s Mansion. Right before it grinded to a stop, a rather loud stop, a man threw open the side of the door and rolled out of the side onto the ground. Landing in a crouch with a gun out and his jacket flapping behind him he looks around and shoots off three consecutive rounds. Then not twenty seconds later his head jerks forward as a “thwap” sound is heard and another man stands behind him saying, “You moron, stop going for those “awesome entrances” and stop wasting bullets. My god they cost quite a bit, and money doesn’t grow on trees.”
“But they are made from trees!” counters the man on the ground. As he puts his gun into a small hoister in his jacket, and gives a grin that naturally inspires anger.
The second man then twitches, and says, “Fine, no more root beer, or chocolate cigarettes for a week.” He says, as the first man’s face turns to utter despair, and water starts welling in his eyes, “You need a break anyways; seriously, I think I am getting second hand diabetes.”
“My eating habits are not that bad Brenjamin!” The man says as he stands up, and pulls out a chocolate cigarette which he puts in his mouth.
“They gave 1/10th of what you ate to a hummingbird. It went into a diabetic coma.” Bren says, “Brandon, that is very bad.”
“Oh please,” Brandon says, “I eat a lot each day.”
“No, this is 1/10th of what you ate in 42 minutes.” Bren tells him.
Brandon frowns and just says, “Oh. Damn. Maybe you do have a point…”
Bren rolls his eyes then says, “I always do. Now come on.” He says.
As Bren begins a walk towards the front door of the mansion, Brandon catches up and starts walking backwards, looking at his partner and asking, “So what is the case this time. Cause after the last incident, I figure I should learn this stuff.”
“You mean where you told a woman whose daughter ran away that you found the murderer?” Bren asks as he gives a small grin.
Brandon points at Bren then exclaims, “So sue me, I confused our ‘what is killing the rats’ and ‘runaway daughter’ cases. It was all solved when I mentioned it was a cat that killed and ate the victim!”
Bren sighs as his head falls into his hand, “No, that made it worse.”
Brandon looks at him and tilts his head to the left, “Oh yeh, well it was all better when we mentioned the victim was a rat.”
“No, that made her think your were insulting her daughter. It was better when I put you in a corner for the night, gave her the location of her daughter, and explained your mistake,” Bren says with a sigh.
“That was mean, seriously, I am too old for time outs.” Brandon tells him angrily.
“Whatever,” Bren says, then a mischievous smile appears on his face, “Oh, and have a nice trip Brandon.”
“Wha-“ Brandon starts to say at his foot lands on a sleek rock when he take a step backward and he slips and then falls into a fish pond, “That was an awful joke Bren!“
Bren looks down at his fallen comrade then starts laughing, after a few moments of his laughter –and Brandon glaring- he offers a hand to Brandon. Brandon then takes it, and pulls himself up, then notices a small hint of evil in Bren’s eyes as he is still off balance, and feels his hand become empty as he falls into the pond again. He looks up to see Bren holding his stomach while bend over laughing.
After the laughing subdues Bren offers his hand again, which Brandon takes. Brandon then quickly pulls at Bren’s arm trying to pull him in, but Bren angles his pull so that Brandon lands in the grass, “Dammit. Jackass.” Brandon murmurs, causing Bren to laugh some more.
Brandon stands up and faces Bren, then says, “I will get you. Just wait.”
“Sure you wi-“ Bren starts to say, and is then interrupted by Brandon putting his foot against Bren’s chest and pushing him backwards into the fish pond.
“FOR REVENGE” Brandon yells as a war cry.
“Would you god damn fucking sons of bitches shut the fuck up, while we wait for the damn detectives assholes! And get off our lawn!” A girl yells as she looks out at the two men, then when she sees Bren she points and yells “YOU!”
Bren looks up at her and then stands up wide eyed and disturbed, “YOU!” he yells pointing at her.
Brandon then looks at her, “You,” He says, as he looks at her outfit and points towards her, “Are in a french maid outfit, which might I say is quite hot.”
Not even three minutes after the first girl started yelling a second one comes out, meekly peeking past the open door towards the strangers, then looking up at her fellow French maid and asking, “Alex, what is wrong…”
“Emily! Kick those damn perverts out of here!” Alex yells at her fellow maid, while still glaring at Bren, “We especially don’t want that douche bag here when the detectives come here!”
Emily looks up at Alex then says in a fearful voice, “Alex…Those are the detectives”
Alex looks at Emily, then at her hand pointing at Bren, then at Bren himself, then at Brandon, “NANI!?!?!” She yells as Brandon does a small wave, and Bren continues to eye her cautiously, “You mean…the detectives…are these horrible hobos?!?!?! I imagined them…suave and cool, and so bishonen like…
“How can that douche be a detective though?!?! That murderer!” She yells again pushing her finger as far forward towards Bren as she can, pure anger in her every pore.
Brandon looks at Bren, then at Alex, then he quickly runs to the car and returns holding a tub of popcorn, “Juicy drama now.” He says excitedly and points forward like a movie producer.
Alex looks towards Brandon and glares, then looks back towards Bren, “You killed my pet tiger Killer!” She yells and jabs her finger towards him again, “And then you took advantage of me while we were drunk!”
Brandon looks at bren then says, “Wait, that fucker has murder and sex on me, come on, I am supposed to be the immoral one!”
Bren looks at alex then yells back, “Your ‘killer’ was a freaking tiger and tried to kill me! It was self defense! And you’re the one who cut off my pinky toes!” Then he shivers, “And you’re the one who jumped me when we were drunk and dragged me to that bedroom!”
Brandon looks at Alex then jumps up and points, “SO YOU ARE WHY HE NEVER ACCEPTS MY ENGRAVED PINKY TOE RINGS EACH YEAR!”
Emily looks hesitantly at Brandon, “Engrave…pinky toe rings?” She asks bewildered, “Do they really make those?”
“Yes, yes they do,” Brandon says enthusiastically, “If you know who to bribe, and where to look.”
“They do, he has given me upwards of fifty pairs over the years,” Bren says unenthusiastically, never looking away from the one who took his toes from him.


Update one:

“Actually it was more like 53-and-a-half pairs” Brandon muses, “But who is counting?”
“Apparently you are…” Emily murmers.
“NO NOISE FROM THE PEANUT GALLERY!” Brandon yells pointing at Emily, then looks at his friend, “I guess I will now have to get engraved pinky rings…and I can get myself a pair, matching pinky rings with our names on them!”
“Why God? What did I do to deserve this!” Bren asks, pleading with the sky, attempting –and failing—to gain some form of mercy from whatever deities may rule it.
Emily then looks around, and meekly murmurs, “Where did Alex go, and what is that noise in the distance?”
Brandon looks at the girl, “I dunno, I haven’t seen her in like 20 minutes…” he says then looks in the direction of his car, and hears screaming, “uh…”
“WHITNEY, NO, BRAKE, NOT SPEED UP, NO. STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP” is heard resounding through the courtyard, mixing with the sound of an overworked car engine. And within a minute a car is sighted heading straight towards the two detectives’ car, going at a good seventy miles an hour.

Update dos:

Bren looks at the scene with disgust and fear as the two cars collide, and flames begin to cover both of them, “OH GOD NOT MY BABY!”
Brandon just excitedly looks at the spectacle and yells in joy, “DAUGHTER!” then begins to run in the direction of the crash.
“Whitney get your ass out of the car! This is bad!” Yells a tall girl of about 5 foot 8 as she makes her way out of the fiery wreck. Her bright pink hair trapped under her, as she pulls herself out a window, and her long hair falls to its natural position at her waist, and small strands of her natural black hair show under the light of the growing fire. And she then wipes off all the dust and other stuff that has gotten on her clothes, and spends most of the time getting it off of her large double H breasts. She then looks to see her cohort Whitney already out of the car, and running towards Brandon.
As the two meet in the middle in front of the inferno that was the two cars, they embrace lovingly and start spinning in a circle, never separating. As the two cars explode and fly upwards behind them, landing in two separate parts of the mansion.
“FATHER” Whitney yells.
“DAUGHTER!” Brandon exclaims, as tears of joy begin running down both of their faces.
“Father!”
Daughter!”
“Father!”
Daughter!”
“Father!”
Daughter!”
“Father!”
Daughter!”
“Father!”
Daughter!”
“Father!”
Daughter!”
“Father!”
Daughter!”
“Father!”
Daughter!”

Update 3:

Then the two are pulled apart, Molly holding Whitney’s collar, and Bren holding Brandon’s. As the party-poopers glare at each other, and say at the exact same time, “No associating with the enemy!”
Emily blinks, then rubs her eyes, then exclaims, “What the fuck is going on here?!?” Her meekness and shyness getting replaced by pure confusion, “How are they father and daughter? And Who are these two new people. And….What is that girl wearing?” She asks looking at molly.
Molly looks at her, “What do you mean?” She asks, while she wears dark, black, knee high boots. And fish net covers her upper thighs and arms. Then right above the fishnet is a super short, dark, black, mini-skirt barely going past her panties. Which one could logically question the existence of such a thing. Then everyone gets a view of her exposed stomach, and her bellybutton, which happens to be pierced, while she wears a tube top with, “Your bitch! Right here!” Written on it. On her neck is a very tight cat collar, and her lips have dark red lipstick on them, along with a piercing on the bottom lip. And when she opens her mouth a tongue piercing is noticeable too.

Urgh

Neck is hurting right now, and it hurts to breathe.

load of nothing happened today...

uhm. Yeh. Nothing...

Have an urge to write a death scene from random story in my head...

I gots my dna~

So went to greene county career center, basically a super version of school, where you really specilize in something, and realized how amazing it would be for me, and that i want to go so bad. But i miss all of regular school if i do. Away from idiots. But also from friends...i probably will do it. It gets collage credits and scholarships and everything...And i need to start paying attention to that. Hrm. What to do.

And uhm. Got my DNA its awesome.

Life goes on...

So the world spins
Faster and faster
No one wins
As lies we master

life goes on
Life goes on.

So we learn true pain
we grow and we change
cherished memories we gain
how long it takes may range

Life goes on
Life goes on

Old Frienships are lost
in the space of time
And so those old memories are tossed
Only a forgotten line

Life goes on
Life goes on

Finding new loves
as our emotions grow
And with the flight of doves
old feelings i come to know

life goes on
life goes on

do i risk it all
or hide away
do i chance another fall
or hope for a better day

life goes on
life goes on

if we all are to die
fade away at times late
why shall we try
shall we give it to fate

Life goes on
Life goes on

To stay in this place
and harm my friends
to avoid their face
i may miss my chance at amends

life goes on
life goes on

embarrassing wants call to me
tiny lights of hope
acting as a saving rope
trying to drag me from hate and apathy

life goes on
life goes on

Where do i belong
how am i too be
whose good can i see
what ideals are my song?

Life goes on
life goes on

don't give up
don't give in
if you do you won't win
life is yours in a cup

life goes on
life goes on

live for here and now
forget what was owned by some
don't ask what is to come
forget about the "why" and"how"

life goes on
life goes on

we are all forgotten
left to the barren earth
it is are final hearth
as what is left turns rotten

life goes on
life goes on

but we rest with those we knew
with all of those who we lost
for the happiness given pain was the cost
and you find your wishes true

life goes on
life goes on

when you're gone
life goes on

life goes on
forever and ever

past this dawn
life goes on

Nothin much

Finished Codex alera. Great series.

Hrm. Uhm. Oh, snuck up behind Tay and Em, and when htey mentioned my name tay looked at me, then said nothing, and i grabbed both of their shoulders and went "Speak of the Devil" Making emily jump. IT was funny.

And i got a 104 on the math test i thougth i failed 0.o what the fuck life?

Very short/

Got my book, on 297/465

New season of scrubs on tonight. Though it seems like it is gonna fail...

Oh, and if I snipe emily and wish her happy nth month anniversary she gets mad. Quite amusing xD

Okay, catch up time.

Lets see. First to get it out of the way. Due to laziness i not gonna do a little thankful for yada yada post. It is redundant, i have expressed how i feel bout most all of you to your face or on blog, and have no urge to do that. AKA lazy.

Hrm. Uhm. Beginning of break i helped mediate a big fight between Gabs, Alex, and Mayu and ben. I have big respect for Gabs, cause she realized there was just some miscommunication, nad that there was just a small issue, and went to me to get it sorted out, since she knew alex would not listen. And She cared enough to directly act and try and get it sorted it, and took my advice. I like that girl. Smart and cool.

Now Mayu, wow, she went super bitch. And her sorries and everything is just bull shit. I despise her. And ben is eh, but he scares me. And always looks constipated...

Uhm. Finished Eureka 7. Very good series. It is gurren extended, action slowed a good bit, romance given more time.

Hrm. Went to bens. And i am amazed at how much Laura and Ben have changed. Laura is now really romantic, and at ease with it all, and just seems perfectly comfortable with everything, unlike times before when she was really awkward with stuff. And Ben, well, he is less shy now. And Good with it all too. and he and kasha decided to wait till after i left to kiss D:< TEN SECONDS EARLIER THEY COULD HAVE DONE IT D:<

Hrm. Jess gonna end it with paco. Right around the time me and Mo said it would. xD Another i called it moment.

Hrm. Been watching lots of scrubs, finishing season 8, then i have seen them all. Though season 9 is basically a spin off, just keeping name. It bodes badly. And saddens me.

Garfunkle and Oates obsession back.

Hrm. BOOK NEEDS TO COME.

Oh. I no scoped head shotted on modern warfare 2. It was super badassery and pwn.

And while i always support tay and his relationships, i now support him and laura so much. They did an exact, simultaneous, flip off. With the same hands, in the same motion, at the same speed, with no planning or anything they lifted their arms and flicked me off. It was amazing.

And today. Ugh. Tired. Staying up till twelve and waking up at 7 sucks when you did a 12-12 sleep scheduele the last week >.>

Ugh why is it not here.

So school out for week. Which kicks ass. And my book is out today, mom ordered it from books and co, so it should be delivered here...WHY CANT IT BE HERE ALREADY D:

Not much.

Hrm. Basically bitchified and willing to do anything for em. Eh, i be whipped xD Not that i care.

Hrm. Almost done with eureka.

Realized how much weekly yugioh does for me.

Hmm. I had a sugar packet, it broke in pocket, got over phone. Now it tastes good.

Uhm. Something i had to say, but i forget, oh well.

Greatest. Phil. Freak out. Ever.

Colberoth Norris (8:48:54 PM): oh, leave the state
Colberoth Norris (8:48:56 PM): http://www.thinkgeek.com/caffeine/candy/9f5d/
Colberoth Norris (8:48:59 PM): I sending alex this
ArgyrisArcher (8:49:28 PM): ...OH SHIT
ArgyrisArcher (8:49:29 PM): NO
ArgyrisArcher (8:49:30 PM): DON'T
ArgyrisArcher (8:49:32 PM): DON'T DO IT
ArgyrisArcher (8:49:34 PM): D:
Colberoth Norris (8:50:21 PM): and hiv too
ArgyrisArcher (8:50:54 PM): ...
ArgyrisArcher (8:51:03 PM): You're expecting Alex to pass HIV around?
Colberoth Norris (8:51:16 PM): Probably
ArgyrisArcher (8:51:35 PM): Why?
Colberoth Norris (8:52:32 PM): because it is alex
ArgyrisArcher (8:52:42 PM): And she sleeps around?
Colberoth Norris (8:52:59 PM): You don't need to do that to pass along hiv in plush form
ArgyrisArcher (8:53:24 PM): >_>
Colberoth Norris (8:53:40 PM): plus there was the time at sugoi...
ArgyrisArcher (8:54:41 PM): You cheated on Emily?
Colberoth Norris (8:54:50 PM): No she was there too. God.
ArgyrisArcher (8:55:22 PM): How'd she get HIV from Sugoi, then?
Colberoth Norris (8:55:35 PM): What happen in sugoi stays in sugoi
ArgyrisArcher (8:56:07 PM): That's creepy
Colberoth Norris (8:57:00 PM): YEs
ArgyrisArcher (8:58:15 PM): So basically, Alex has AIDS now?
Colberoth Norris (8:59:25 PM): No HIV
Colberoth Norris (9:01:27 PM): You probably just wish you gave her HIV
ArgyrisArcher (9:01:40 PM): So basically, Alex made a big decision at Sugoi?
Colberoth Norris (9:01:47 PM): oh yes
ArgyrisArcher (9:02:13 PM): With somebody that has HIV?
Colberoth Norris (9:02:31 PM): maybe
ArgyrisArcher (9:03:07 PM): Are you serious, or are you just trying to scare me?
Colberoth Norris (9:03:20 PM): ....PLUSHES
Colberoth Norris (9:03:22 PM): DEar god
ArgyrisArcher (9:05:08 PM): So she had the TMI moment with a plush?
Colberoth Norris (9:05:30 PM): http://www.thinkgeek.com/geektoys/science/6708/
Colberoth Norris (9:05:34 PM): She got touched by hiv
Colberoth Norris (9:05:40 PM): and was therefore infected
ArgyrisArcher (9:06:58 PM): OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH
ArgyrisArcher (9:07:08 PM): THANKS FOR SHOWING ME THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE
ArgyrisArcher (9:07:10 PM): GOD
Colberoth Norris (9:07:16 PM): xD
ArgyrisArcher (9:07:43 PM): IT WOULD HAVE REALLY HELPED
Colberoth Norris (9:08:01 PM): NAh
ArgyrisArcher (9:08:49 PM): -_-
Colberoth Norris (9:09:01 PM): that freak out made my day
ArgyrisArcher (9:10:25 PM): <_<
Colberoth Norris (9:10:35 PM): *goes to put in blog*
ArgyrisArcher (9:10:42 PM): >_<
Colberoth Norris (9:12:00 PM): You where jealous that whole time weren;t ya? xD
ArgyrisArcher (9:13:46 PM): Maybe

Ugh.

Its one of those days. Feel crappy. Feel hateful. Don't wanna do anything. Feeling depressed and angry for no reason. Ugh. Today already sucks. I think i am gettin sick too. Needs to be tommorow. I need tournament...

Stuff i want for chistmas

http://cgi.ebay.com/Brand-New-Anime-Code-Geass-54-Playing-Cards-HP89_W0QQitemZ290362815112QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item439af8f288

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-piece-luffy-POKER-playing-card-cosplay-new_W0QQitemZ220512717302QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item33579509f6

http://cgi.ebay.com/Anime-one-piece-Sexy-Girls-ultimate-game-card-play-mat_W0QQitemZ220513580686QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3357a2368e xDDD

http://cgi.ebay.com/Hitman-Reborn-Poker-Playing-Cards-Anime-h26_W0QQitemZ260343865307QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3c9db41fdb

http://cgi.ebay.com/D-Gray-man-Poker-Playing-Cards-Anime-h25-FREE-SHIP_W0QQitemZ270487980310QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3efa570916

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Rubiks-Cube-Mass-Characters-Anime-m0362_W0QQitemZ250530542229QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54c8b295

http://stores.ebay.com/SSS-Anime__W0QQ_fsubZ621884017

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Skull-Pocket-Watch-With-Chain-Cosplay-k331_W0QQitemZ250530843428QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54cd4b24

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Skull-Logo-Messager-Shoulder-Bag-c002_W0QQitemZ270484896337QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3efa27fa51 DUDE EPIC

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-White-Beard-Pirate-Flag-Cosplay-Anime-m0673_W0QQitemZ250529938521QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54bf7c59

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Luffy-Messenger-Shoulder-Bag-c173_W0QQitemZ250533699584QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54f8e000

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Luffy-Straw-Hat-Pirate-Flag-Cosplay-m0674_W0QQitemZ270484520809QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3efa223f69

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Luffy-Straw-Hat-Cap-Cosplay-Anime-m0488_W0QQitemZ260496943640QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca6d3ea18

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Skull-Logo-Messenger-Shoulder-Bag-Anime-c386_W0QQitemZ260506435304QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca764bee8

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Skull-Logo-Messenger-Shoulder-Bag-Anime-c600_W0QQitemZ250530370482QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54c613b2

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Many-Characters-Shoulder-Messenger-Bag-c316_W0QQitemZ250532202016QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54e20620

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Shanks-the-Red-Shoulder-Messenger-Bag-c320_W0QQitemZ260506481978QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca765753a

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Tony-Tony-Chopper-Messenger-Shoulder-Bag-c719_W0QQitemZ260509142817QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca78e0f21

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Backpack-Bag-School-Sport-Anime-c753_W0QQitemZ270484892632QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3efa27ebd8

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Skull-Logo-Black-Wallet-Anime-RARE-c575_W0QQitemZ250532068177QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54dffb51

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Luffy-Shanks-Black-Wallet-Anime-RARE-c700_W0QQitemZ260508111659QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca77e532b

http://cgi.ebay.com/Hitman-Reborn-Rubiks-Cube-Mass-Characters-Anime-m0353_W0QQitemZ260506988846QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca76d312e

http://cgi.ebay.com/Hitman-Reborn-Tsuna-Gokudera-Yellow-Wallet-Anime-c458_W0QQitemZ270486481612QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3efa402acc

http://cgi.ebay.com/Hitman-Reborn-Rubiks-Cube-Mass-Characters-Anime-m0353_W0QQitemZ250465863647QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a50edc7df

http://cgi.ebay.com/Hitman-Reborn-Katekyo-Cap-Hat-Cosplay-Anime-m0487_W0QQitemZ260508513663QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca784757f

http://cgi.ebay.com/Hitman-Reborn-a-pair-of-Gloves-Anime-Cosplay-m0273_W0QQitemZ270484952223QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3efa28d49f

http://cgi.ebay.com/Hitman-Reborn-Hibird-Duck-Coin-Purse-Plush-Wallet-c204_W0QQitemZ250420251477QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a4e35cb55

http://cgi.ebay.com/Hitman-Reborn-Mukuro-Hibari-Messenger-Shoulder-Bag-c630_W0QQitemZ250530363957QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54c5fa35

http://cgi.ebay.com/Katekyo-Hitman-Reborn-a-pair-of-Gloves-Cosplay-m0720_W0QQitemZ250533789049QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54fa3d79

http://cgi.ebay.com/Soul-Eater-Wallet-Cosplay-Anime-RARE-c274_W0QQitemZ260509145404QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca78e193c

http://cgi.ebay.com/Soul-Eater-Messenger-Shoulder-Bag-Cosplay-Anime-c298_W0QQitemZ250532214171QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54e2359b

http://cgi.ebay.com/Soul-Eater-Messenger-Shoulder-Bag-Cosplay-c244_W0QQitemZ270486601064QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3efa41fd68

http://cgi.ebay.com/Soul-Eater-Logo-Messenger-Shoulder-Bag-Anime-c510_W0QQitemZ260508724154QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca787abba

http://cgi.ebay.com/Soul-Eater-T-Shirt-Costume-Anime-Cosplay-a080_W0QQitemZ260445233119QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3ca3bedfdf

http://cgi.ebay.com/Code-Geass-C-C-Suzaku-Lelouch-Lamperouge-Wallet-Anime_W0QQitemZ250533095944QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54efaa08

http://cgi.ebay.com/Final-Fantasy-Chocobo-Xmas-Soft-Plush-Toy-Doll-b063_W0QQitemZ250530865044QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item3a54cd9f94

http://cgi.ebay.com/Deathnote-Anime-Death-Note-Poker-Playing-Cards_W0QQitemZ370293192659QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item563731b7d3

http://cgi.ebay.com/Final-Fantasy-XIII-13-Poker-Playing-Cards_W0QQitemZ350276451613QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item518e1a7d1d

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Anime-Poker-Playing-Cards-3_W0QQitemZ370287442033QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item5636d9f871

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Anime-Poker-Playing-Cards-2_W0QQitemZ370287442074QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item5636d9f89a

http://cgi.ebay.com/One-Piece-Anime-Poker-Playing-Cards-1_W0QQitemZ370287442124QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item5636d9f8cc

http://cgi.ebay.com/Melancholy-Of-Haruhi-Suzumiya-Poker-Playing-Cards_W0QQitemZ350248479412QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item518c6faab4

http://cgi.ebay.com/Shaman-King-Anime-Poker-Playing-Cards-2_W0QQitemZ350276449746QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item518e1a75d2

http://cgi.ebay.com/Yu-Yu-Hakusho-Anime-Poker-Playing-Cards-1_W0QQitemZ370287440829QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item5636d9f3bd
Wow...this got big...Cards big priority.

not much today.

No meds makes working fail. Got Phone back. Saw play, did not suck. Was funny. Oh, and at end of day i hugged whit, and she was like "Oops almost kissed you there, eh, for old times sake" and kissed me, it was kinda funny xD And Em was just looking at us like "what are you guys on?" xD

this drama is so juicy.

For all readers here is simple vague version

Colberoth Norris (3:08:44 PM): So this girl lucas thinks she is dating my friend taylor
Colberoth Norris (3:09:46 PM): (jessica lucas, girl)When he never sees, speaks, or cares for her. And so taylor told her they where not dating and to stop telling people that on my friend bens phone
Colberoth Norris (3:10:20 PM): and she is like "wtf taylor" And he says he is not interested. Then she responsed "Taylor do you know who this is, and i love you"

Oh god. This will be funny. I know it is cruel as hell. But this is just hilarious. Though sucks for ben, since lucas will steal kasha in sadness. Meaning Hain indirectly cock blocked him.

Onto my day: So, after going to bed at 7, then waking up at 11 i could not fall asleep, and surfed on DSi, and tried to sleep, and then failed, and surfed on dsi, and fell asleep round 4 woke up at 6:30. Yet i am oddly energetic today. And i did not take meds, but after i ate i was focusing perfectly. Odd.

And woot basically weekend. Since there is not much being done tommorow~ *waves yay flag*

dear god

go to sleep late and i get annoying dreams >.< now i went to bed early and woke up 4 hours latter or sso and am wide awake. fuck this. sleep issues plus mom always being a bitch are getting to me. and i keep feeling like bursting into tears nightly, even when happy >.< i hate life at times.

Oh yeh i forgot

Academic club was cut from school budget D: I no like that.

God. Odd. Two years...

Lately i have been reminiscing nad thinking about the past. I dunno why. But i have changed so much. I have become less hurtful, violent, and emo. Less of just spurting out comments, insults, perversion. I have stopped thinking how so many things are pointless, and i have learned so much. God, two years and some change ago i could not wrap my head around the idea of dating. I was super anti touchey. And nothing seemed purposeful. I could not see why people took something small so deeply, how so many little things could harm people. Hell. I couldn't feel more than small compassion for people, even then i could not care a tiny bit if i lost friends, it just was nothing.

Now, god. I am head over heels in love with Emily, and all those stupid and pointless things mean the world to me. I love many of my friends to a degree that makes it painful for me to know they hurt. Hell. I love my daughter whitney more than most anything else, and i love alex in so many different ways.

Hell I am friends with those two. Two or three years ago i barely knew or care for half these people. Now i am friends with laura, dating Emily, closer to alex than i have been with half my old friends, hell, whit, jess, claire, tay, almost all my current friends cept ben i never really talked to or cared about that much. And Scott, bren, Clint. Well. Actually me and scott still talk a lot, and we are close, this is just a lucky miracle. Bren and Clint barely care anymore. Clint not at all.

And i finally got past caring about them. Stopped following that stupid urge to always say anything, anything at all, and just try and rekindle teh lost friendship. Heh. Well, with clint, still trying with bren. Guess losin him still is a bitch. But i have lost a lot of caring for him. And soon he will just be another friend of past, he will be Raj, he will Corey. He will just be a memory.

And i started talking to Kelsey again, dear god, That in itself is amazing and makes me overjoyed. God i love Kelsey. I am glad i tried to rekindle that one.

Heh. Though a slightly ironic thing is, a lot of my beliefs, and my feelings, and learning to care came from Scrubs, Vampire Chronicles, Atlas Shrugged, and other such things. Those things hitting me close and breaking a bit of my hardassness, then letting friends destroy the rest. Odd.

And i been having fucked up dreams. And i really have no fucking idea what my mind is thinking. I mean this dream had emily having a slumber party, at my house. With like ten people. Then i woke up and fell asleep (now gonna be refered to as Wu/Fa) and like i was in the bathroom, then some girl i have seen randomly around school and don't know, care for, or typically think of came in with only bra and panties and tried to screw me, then like ben came in back way, me and her ditched to not be caught and i took a nap...wu/fa and then i am doing random shit, talking to em and other people, wu/fa and i have a digimon. It gets hurt, i am upset, it says to use digivice to revive and more powerful, it digi-rebirths into its next form, then we repeat. then it becomes a sword-optimus prime. Then i go to bro's room. and Emily Balaz i think was there, and she has megatron, i know that out, then push her against a wall with Optimuys prime sword, and some random sword, she then hits on me, and tries to get in my pants. Then i wake up and am like "What the fuck...and why not the hot girls i know and like?"

And 2 days ago there was a dream of these two guys and scientists. One transformed into a super large staff, and when the other touched it he became a huge screwed up lady, called "Giant fucked up lady" And they had to fight a stone abraham lincoln that came to life and was going to take over and become president again...

So i think that not texting into the night till i fall asleep makes me dream, and then wake up from them, and be unable to sleep. Whereas texting till tired makes me stay up later, but sleep better...Odd.

And oh. Funny. Paco was flicking me off for lulz but a teacher saw him and he got a detention. It was stupid. But funny.

Er-shit.

Whole essay due tommorow. Will begin at 4, use as excuse to get time lock removed when it screws me over. Yes.

Nothing much has happened

Not been doin much of anything. Outrageously addicted to Eureka 7. It is a slowed down, romanceyer version of Gurren. Gurren is greater due to it being made of win. But some of the themes, and how they do the stuff, its enthralling. Especially Eureka adn Renton's relationship. Not just instantly starting, not just instantly relizing. The slow awkward parts of a teenage relationship. And the puppy love at first sight. Then Seeing how renton goes from the niave ignorant boy, and all these experiences obviously shape him. Its just amazing. They do it all so well. 20 episodes left...

okay. Oddest perverted dream i had yet...

Well. In it i was hanging alone flirting with a girl. And we had talked about how we would love to get together except i was dating emily. Now this may seem wrong, until we realize the girl i was talking to was emily with straight hair...my dreams. They worry me.

Then i had some dream where i was at a camp. Hanging out with people, on eof em was someone i met years ago and re-friended.

And in one alex was kind, caring, and worried when i got hurt. Scariest. Dream. Ever. God. Alex should never be like that, even in a dream *shiverS*

Dear god...

Rest of day: nothing of notice.

End of bus: I was reading The Tale of The Body Theif...The scene, it was brutal...and i knew it was coming, and why? Because i knew i would do that... god. Lestat...He is so like me

zomg fail parents

So. Super pissed parents off xD Skipped classes and stuff. But now doin work. Haz it all done. Eh. It aint that bad... I guess.

Oh. Lost phone too xD Will have back in "two" weeks. Aka next week.

Uhm. Want to get new pack but can't.

My outrageous amount of horniness has disappeared suddenly. Woot. Not distracted anymore.

Parents did not reban my account. Fuck yeh.

Uhm. Nothing else really.

Good teh bad and teh Ricy

Lets see, lets get out anger first.

Well. Leeland is getting closer to my fucking-retard list of religious zealots. Now i could handle him not liking atheism. And his erraneous ideas on evolution. But then acting like he said soemthing way different than what he said. And Then proceeding to act as if everything in science is just fabricated by some group of tyrannical dictators trying to undermine and destroy all that is good in society and undermine all values known to man...Well that got a bit annoying. And my god how hard it was not to counter everything he said with the exact wording and replacing it with "pope" "venice(that is where everything big is i believe)" and other religious terms. Although even then that was not the big irking thing to get me fucking pissed as hell to the point of a new almost intolerable hatred. It was the fact that upon hearing me say that miguel and i are agnostic atheists telling us "that is not possible" Saying atheism is worshiping the devil, proceeding to say we believed differently than we do -and here is the kicker- calling atheists retards. God fuck. I am so sick of fucking religious zealots acting so high and fucking mighty about something that in most cases we describe as A CHILDS GOD DAMN IMAGINARY FRIEND.

I mean for the love of the god damn world. I am pro religion. But he calls himself christian, and so i will assume that he is catholic, since htey are 1.1/2 billion people, if he is catholic he is going against his god-damned-fucking religion since guess what life, the pope, the word of god almighty, said evolution is fine. Though no, he acts as if there are no facts or definitions in science. Even though, you know, the SCIENTISTs give the stuff definitions and ideas. And Pluto just randomly got lessened because people felt like it, not because they assigned an actual definition to what a "planet" "exoplanet" "dwarf planet" are. Dear god.

And i still have to deal with that idiotic ideal of "every religious ideal, no matter how retarded should be respected". I swear, i am half tempted to get a "i don't like adults who have imaginary friend's" shirt, just to piss people off. And then go super militia atheist, and hate upon religion. Especially the fucking old testament. Which goes against most every ideal people hold. Heh. But yeh. Leeland can have his hate reciprocated now.

Ricy-
So i have been reading more Vampite chronicles. And Dear god. I am more nad more realizing how i am lestat. BEsides the obvious vampires are like me body wise (bar the super powers and immortality) but just on how he believes. How he loves taking events and working them to their highest level, and feeling ectasy when he can. And how he wonders why he does not feel guilt even when he believes something is evil. And how he wants to embody evil to give good something to fight, all this stuff, it is interesting, and oddly i relate to it on smaller scales. Since, ya know, i don't kills thousands over hundreds of years...

Good- still closer to em, find her amazing, yada yada, i will skip these little praisings for you all. You get it and probably dun wanna hear it. And she hears it all the time. So yeh. You know the drill.

Ben and kasha are back~

Me and whitney have been laughing around a lot, telling each other how much we love the other. It's good fun. The stares we get increase each day xD I swear, we are the two most romantic acting guy-girl friendship in the group when in public xD Since em gets all shy in public, and no one else is as whorish as me and whit xD Yet all the feelings are father-daughter, kinda funny xD

Uhm. Wow. Not a lot worth mentioning of good happened...

Oh. Super gun. In jak. It rules.

Random part of random story i never have typed-

"Maro, how did you do it? How did you remain so fearless?" Kanna asks his friend, while staring at his trembling hands.

Maro looks at his friend with a look of disbelief, "Fearless? I was scared as hell. I thought we where gonna die," he says with a laugh, "how could i not be scared? But that is the thing, when you let fear rule you, you lose. And in that game, well, the life was the forfeit. Which i don't like. So i pushed away the fear, till there was time to be scared.


"Now, come on Kanna, there is still work to do." He tells his friend, as he extends a hand which Kanna grabs. Maro pulls him up and they exchange a smile and a nod. And they then continue their trek, ready for all battles that are to come.

Meh, small blog.

dad was home so i could not sneak on.

And hmm. I know this will sound odd. But i really miss Alex...I mean. Something captivated me about her, not sexually or romantically (which in itself is rare as hell), and i just want her back over here...I mean. I use her as my recover line more nowadays, she is what ben, tay, bren, scott, etc have been. Except moreso...Bah.

And still have work to do.

day two of grounding.

Well. I actually have lost all urge to be online. I mostly did nothing. So i can just talk to people via phone. Haha, fuck you parents.

New jak game is cool, but his goatee is a secret?!?!? I HAVE TO BUY HIS EPIC GOATEE?!?!?! WHAT IS UP WITH THAT?!?!

Uhm. In bertke we explained our scarlet letters. You say name, what it is, and how life would be better. Mine was l for lazy, it went like this: "uhm, i am brandon, it is an l for lazy, and i am to lazy to explain the rest" and i went to my seat. Everyone laughed. Haha. Fuck you rigth way. Muahhaha.

Uhm. Been really energetic, and horny, like almost highish feeling. It is a tad annoying.

I Realize i feel sicker eating on meds than not eating...

Uhm. I wanna play new jak game, but gotta wait till bro gets here.

Gonna have to do homework more now T_T

Fcuking mcdonald...

So math teacher mcdonald did not alert me or parents how badly i was screwing up, and how little i got done. And did not update progressbook till end of quarter. So teh math grade went from 72 to 27 (-5 for missing, -3 for incomplete) which has gotten me grounded. So will be here less.

And i realized another thing about me and em. She now realizes how much control she has on me and will use it. Shit.

Well. Overall shitty mood. Well. Shitty experience. Good mood.

Have to restart comp project. Me and shultz think that something is buggy in the world itself. and a new one should make it work fine.

Uhm. Life is sucking. So nothing new.

Eh. End.

Random musing, random musing.

Hmm. Bit feelin a bit more perverse than usual. Odd. Dunno why. Guess cons (*cough*rave*cough*) bring out my super perv.

ME and alex have taken our joke of a Gurren Lagann cult to facebook. Woot. xD

Me and emily have been awkward on some stuff. Just kinda weird about it, but not in a bad way. And we have just seemed a lot closer now. Haha.

Uhm. Uhm. I have a shitload of candy since no one trick or treated. So i have hundreds of pieces of candy needing to be eated. I will have to help them *noms*

And i have IBC rootbeer. You know. After the crap of sugoi you would think i would retain anger. But god damn life is going great.

lol. Out of context is fun

Colberoth Norris (5:34:18 PM): He likes htem
Colberoth Norris (5:34:20 PM): obviously
Colberoth Norris (5:34:23 PM): he is a furry
"emilt" (5:34:27 PM): i feel exactly those feelings too


in another chat:

ArgyrisArcher (5:37:13 PM): ...
ArgyrisArcher (5:37:16 PM): Wtf Facebook
"emilt" (5:37:27 PM): -read that as "wet facebook"- -facepalm-
starlightgal93 (5:37:37 PM): ...xDD Yes. Definately pervy
Colberoth Norris (5:37:43 PM): xDDDDDDDDD
ArgyrisArcher (5:37:47 PM): Wtf Melty
starlightgal93 (5:37:53 PM): Wet Melty....
"emilt" (5:37:54 PM): ...NO
ArgyrisArcher (5:37:54 PM): >_>
Colberoth Norris (5:37:58 PM): XDDDDDD
"emilt" (5:37:58 PM): DO NOT

More:
ArgyrisArcher (5:38:43 PM): *slinks back into uncooperative Facebook*

Damn so much shit. So much good. So much bad. So much insanely interesting.

Okay, started out getting up insanely early. Talked to killer and Kelsey a good bit till the girls got me.

We went back to emilys. And all hung out there. Me and alex met for the first time, in a totally anticlimatic way xD We did not make it anything big. We just hung out and got along as if this was an everyday thing. Which in all honesty is amazing, her and me hangin out was a natural friendship. Just like seein everyone at school.

So we all talked and gamed in car (I super pwned alex in days over and over)and we all talked and joked. All twas fun.

Uhm. Got to con. We walked around a lot. Me and alex ended up alone a lot. So many things went on. Emily missed all our fun. But me nad her joked and played a lot. Spent outrageous amount of money on gurren stuff. And i also bought 5 mini FF figures. Well. Shoplifted two on accident >.> But we laughed and had fun.

We all hung out in emilys room later. We sat around and joked, ate food and what not, watched scary movie. Never did go swimming. And her parents saw me and her laying on the bed, her half asleep and me holding her and they got supa pissed xD It was kinda funny.

Oh oh oh. I had discovered card room too I <3 it. Spent lots of down time there. And earlier i proposed to random people. And found waldo over and over again. And bought more FFIX figurines. Adn thought i had all of them. Until i realized i had no freya.

Now here is the upcoming "wtf?" moment.

So emily and Alex where tired and retired early. So me, paco, and jess went to rave. We danced around there and had fun.

Tangent: I realized that at raves i slowly can't do much but sit there. I hate idea of dancing and hate the place. I just study all the people and start getting in awe of the whole situation. Then i slowly start moving around. I eventually start congaing and dancing. Odd.

Back on track: So i was mainly dirty dancing with paco and matt. And it was all good. Then Jess and I and paco tried to go get alex and em to come to rave. I hung out to the side, left Jess to it. and talked to these awesome guys who told an hilarious story about this guy. Will tell later. But then at one part of the story these three women (A mom, 25 year old ichigo cosplayer, and a 19 year old who looked my age) where like "waht?!?!" and we invited them out, and told the story.

We then left emily alone and we went back to rave. Dirty danced with everyone, and flirted nad what not. And i was the official jail bait, the one guy told me to stop being a whore and jailbait xD it was epic.

"wtf"? Super stupid moment follows. If you don't wanna hear nad ruin the funness of the con skip.

So at 1:50 i took jess to her room, cause i had her key adn mine, and we had to figure out whose was whose so i could sleep. And emily's mom sees us and the conversation is as follows

"where have you two been?"

"We where at the rave"

"I have been looking for you guys for 3 hours, i was in the rave, they took me around with flashlights, did you not see me?" -lie. we checked in an hour ago when we went to rave with epic peoples.

"No"

"Ugh. I don't think you have a girlfriend anymore! *walks away and hits a wall* I am so fucking pissed."

Me nad jess then stood there a bit stunned. Jess figure out the key while i stood there just distraught.

And apparently jess went in crying since that is what emily said and i told her the story. I also ended up telling my mom (showing how fucked up i was) As i tried to calm my body down. And i tried to obey mind. I was on the verge of tears. Even though i knew it would blow over nad be nothing, my body would not listen.

I ended up falling asleep. after saying night to everyone.

Badness sorta ends:

Next morning was awkward most of time. Emily was depressed. I was trying not to be. Alex and i hung out, fought a lot, and we went to buy me more gurren, black cat, and other stuff. And i got the freya i was missing >.> The vendor knew me well. Oh so well. He recongnized me. xD


But in the end me and em sat around in karoke, and we ended up closer than ever, neither of us wanting to lose the other. And it was shown as we held each other as we had to leave, neither of us wanting to break the hug or leave the other. heh.

And so we had to leave. I hugged everyone and when alex hugged me she smacked me in the back and apologized. I laughed it off cause i knew it would happen. And i knew for her just accepting the hug was huge xD Adn that was her way of showing affection xD

Usual note, none of following meant to be romantic. It is sister-brother kinda thing. If you still think after reading my blog that love is always romantic (with exception of the obvious one (if you don't know who that is shoot yourself) in this blog) then please. Kill yourself:
But god. I realized how much i love alex during this con. I really wish she was around here. She And i got along well. Even after con we laughed at how people thought we where dating. we said how we acted same in real life, and how we where tight as hell -as Gurren Lagann cult members should be-, and that we needed to get em to join, and we could get tight with her xD All sorts of fun stuff. Its just. We are so much alike, yet so different, something about her i just love. Haha.

Continuing: So car ride home i was hungry, then felt guilty bout week and lost it, then talking to em we both admitted how little we cared about what her mom said, and how we cared for each other. And i felt hungry again. And i joked how it was 4:35 and if mom drove fast i could get to schumer's (yugioh tourney) and get a sneak peek set. Well. We thought it would be impossible, except i checked phone to call him, and saw it was barely 4, we had not chnaged her car for the hour back thing. So i was like "=o" and rushed her there. After i called and he said they had some left. So i pulled rare but crappy cards. However i traded it for the card i needed. So i was like :DDD from talking to em, and her text. Then like :DDDDDDDDDD from the card. Then i went home. And napped from 4 or 5 to 9. Then stayed up texting an hour. Then fell back asleep.

Random things i forgot: We all pooled together money to get ben epic shirt. And i bought pin.

Lienea was being all mean. So i no be nice to her anymore. Oh. And leeland apparently hates me. I haven't talked to him enough to really get him to hate me, and definitly didn't know him enough to get super-douche-tastic. Odd. Oh well. He stays on list of People-i-don't-care-about

I will upload pictures onto Facebook later

I was pwning with my deck. I love how it is running.

Me and Alex making a facebook group 8DDD

Uhm. Laura could not see me today because i was wearing gurren shirt, and two pins xD

Tay got dumped sadly. T_T

And that is all. So see ya

Something i forgot to add for lulz:

And by the by alex. You are a kind sweet wonderful helpful girl. Who is pretty and beautiful. *hugs*

Oh yeh, more i forgot:

Alex you said 2 months ago you would remmber why i pissed you off. And beat me near death. You never did. And you forgot why you said it xD Fail.

8D

WHY UNI WHY

WHY FORESHADOW HER DEATH WHY I LIKE UNI T_T

Interesting day

well, been fretting doing lots of last minute work. Caught up. But i have a notebook quiz in math tommorow...oh boy. I am screwed screwed screwed.

Lets see. PRogramming in Comp sci is annoying, it keeps crahing and freezing. So i go to his class tommorow at study hall. Hopefully can finish the 3 projects.

got shit load of study questions for English.

Uhm, nothing chem.

UHm 3 projects due tommorow.. ADN SHIT A PAPER TODAY I GOT TO DO >.<

Lots o spanish cooking.

Some math.

Ugh. stupid school.

But i really enjoyed today, messed around with friends. And Mrs. Fromm's adorable little girl Evi came to her class xD A 3 year old girl in an aurora outfit (disney princess) +Pom poms+ NAthan acting her age= no work done entire class, shitload of laughs, and a great time.

And tay is apparently getting upset when whit tells him to be a tad less clingy, I want to say he is being stupid, but i can't help but defend him. I know how it is. Even if you ask someone to tell you if you go overboard, when they do you feel like your doing everything wrong and they are pissed. I do it a good bit myself. So i can't blame him, but i can talk to him and help him cool down. Need to do that... Will find time.

And uhm. Woot my new deck... and uh, dunno.

WOO FUCKING YES

GOT THE NEW DECK! Fuck yeh.

And crap, need to do work...

And day without meds=fail

interesting fun.

Haha, so i went to tarjay. Good way to bide time. It was cold though and my hands where numb good while after. I saw my awesome social studies teacher nad her kids (who are adorable) and Jenn hessman. Haha, my bro asked if i knew her or just randomly said hi to a stranger (which i would do), but i do like Jenn, i have known her years. I think i had a crush on her in fifth grade. Can't remember...Oh well. But sadly target had no Decks D:

But hmm. It was a good way to burn time. Since the circle is dead. And in all honesty i have been feeling really awkward even there. Heh. Everyone has a clique they for sure can identify with, band, years and years, same grade, etc. But among all the friends i am sorta -prepare for Reborn reference- Cloud like. Held down to no set area, and drifting among them all, the loner to a degree. But sometimes it sucks since i feel so awkward when with people. I mean if i was with just like Ria, laura and rachel i would feel awkward since they are a little girl clique, or if with all the band cultists i would feel a bit awkward. And i already feel awkward and invasive about sugoi. And why? Because i will be randomly showing up saturday, and sorta feeling like i am gonna be interrupting a reunion between the girls and alex. Sorta like i felt at Kings island, except way worse. Since at KI I knew mo before, but i have never met alex.

Though i am oddly excited about meeting her. I mean honestly she has become one of my closest friends. And one of the few people I really want to talk to more often. And when i think about it i have had an outrageously low amount of bad vibes between us. I mean with most people i have had weeks where i couldn't stand them -Ria for past events, Ben for WoW, etc- but i have had only like 2 bad weeks with her (which is low.). And i could easily say i love her (as a friend you stupid love-can-only-be-romance people), and consider her some one super close, and a partner in mischief. Just like my lovely daughter whitney.

And out of all the people she is someone i can easily confide in, easier than most others, i mean with emily i would either feel odd or not want to make her worry. Bren, taylor, scott i barely talk to anymore due to school or other stuff, sometimes i can talk well with louie who i have gotten really close too. But alex. Hmm. I dunno, we are a lot alike, and whenever she feels pain, i can really sympathize, and i usually know what it is like...

Eh. I just really wanted to write. I don't know why. But i have been talking yugioh with phil which is fun. And I have had an urge to type out the one series of stories stuck in my head... Or even write them... Hmmm.

And i have been feeling sick a lot, like naseous. But not really sick. And it is not i have not eaten nauseous. And i have been outrageously tired. Odd...

Oh well. I feel oddly better and calm. Toodaloo and sayanara.

Damnit damnit damnit

I got a bit of work to do. But that is not hard. Lots of spanish cooking >.<

And binder turn in thursday in American studies...hoo boy. Not good.

AND I WANT THE NEW DECK RIGHT NOW. THEY WILL LET ME MAKE SUPER PWN YUGIOH DECK D:< Mom needs to get home so i can buy them D:<

What's your problem?

You two think you can do whatever you want. Well I'm sick of it.

I need to keep this immoralized

starlightgal93 (9:21:38 PM): I found a way to incorporate the ring into tit!!!

Hooky day.

Gah, can't focus, way tired, and outrageously hungry. So i came home. Couldn't stand it. xD

And ASGDFHASD STOP UNRIGGING LOCKER

Also jessica/others who care I can't get to teh parteh tomorrow till like 5-6

Er-

I really can't focus without meds. Today was dull. Found out i was the worst grade in class on math test. Oh well. And. Uhm. Who knows. Nothing else.

Haha, today was not too bad

So like in study hall me and laura had a sharpie Vs. Marker fight, it was fun xD Most productive study hall ever.

And god facebook rules, been talking to Kelsey a lot there. And she is moving to the states, i hope she moves here... I know she won't, but that rules that she may be somewhere around here, so i might be able to see her more. And lol, i just realized that like none of you know of her, or the lulzly past i have with her. I may tell sometime.

And man, now i ish making brother find all my old pokemon cards.

Okay, never go off meds during a test day.

I went off my meds to eat wellz and for cooking lab, then had test at end of day. My god. It was awful... I can't focus without them at all D: When i am on them everything is crystal clear and i can go like god power focus. But when off them...Ow.

Other than that, nada.

lalala

had a party, twas fun, duct taped rachel to stuff, so fun xD I really needed that party.

And i can't find my psp T_T I think it at grandma's...

Uhm, nothing else...

Once. Again. Nothing.

So boring of a day. Most eventful thing was getting shit about cussing from derek who-gives-a-fuck-his-name. He said it showed small vocabulary and yadda yadda, i responded how as he said it was his opinions, and they don't matter for shit, and i thought cuba was random and should be destroyed, religion is pointless and idiotic, and that i think cussing is a good thing with no issue. And by god did he get pissed about religion xD but then we got to go into class, but man, if i said it like he did and responded how i wanted to, "Well, are you religious, if so just stop. It shows a lack of intelligence." xD literally he said "don't curse...Just stop....i think it just shows a lack of vocab." xD Stupid boy.

Titles are not easy when nothing is happening

Visited by career center, seemed interesting, not anything i really want to do...Though i saw Bianca. She is cool. Haha.

Uhm. I am really utterly in love with Intro to Comp Sci...the alice thing, letting you program, and all the technical aspects. It is so intruging nad amazing. And i know how to work it so well. And no worries over what someone will think, or how it will be interpreted, i have to tell the computer everything exactly. It takes it all so literally. Factually. Simply. I love it. I ended up spending last two periods writing out an easy code for current project, but to do it with most efficiency is a bit hard. But i got it down, and it should work perfectly. Then i can add fun extras.

Oh. And the king kong project i did was so damn epic that the teacher is using it for latter years 8D Seriously. I have new respect for anyone making comp games, or programming. All i did was make kong climb a building, and swat planes, and then fall down and die as a plane shot it. And this is with alice, which is easier to use than most. and ya know what, it was a super bitch to do it. Especially plane swatting.

Though now i hate i can't use alice on my computer T_T

Uhm. Uhm. Mom stupid and messed up my farmvilled D:< I am chanign my pass on her.

Hrm. I have started Eureka 7, pretty good so far, yet to get addicted, but haven't gotten as anime-watching-mood. Speciially like i did with Gurren.

No one piece this week DDDD:

Uhm. Uhm. Things still feelin bit awkward between me and some people. Though i am choking it off as "awkward in school and public" things. I mean, taylor won't even accept my love DX

Okay. Yes. I was mainly wanting to post that for no reason. I am bored.

Hmmmm. Anything else...

Oh, was looking at old poems, stories, etc. I sucked a lot xD and still do. Woot failed hobbies of old~

And i guess i will end this. So that's all folks.

zip. nada. zilch

Life is uneventful of late. There was kh and tournament, but i dun care enough to write...

nothin

nuthin to say. had one kh seen stuck in my head with epic quote "Whats your problem? You two think you can do whatever you want...well i'm sick of it. Just keep running, but i will always be here to bring you back!"

Been having lots of doubts and paranoia on who i am, and how i am viewed.

Conflicted on tay and whit. Seeing them together is something i like, i think they look good, glad they are going well yada yada, emphasize, same ol. But i also have inner rage D:< It is a wierd mix!

Hrm, i been feeling bit crappy recently.

Bah, i have been left alone, no one is respondin to anything, so i am bored. But i have been feeling really alone recently. Like i don't have the one group i really belong and fit in. I mean, within all our friends there are obvious sects, and i just don't fit there perfectly. I am that "good friend" "everyones friend" person. Not the best friend. The great friend. The one to tell all the stories to and to always invite.

My grade, i have only really huge connections with tay and miguel. Miguel and social life don't mix. So that dies. And taylor is too busy with band, and i never see him, so we barely talk and hang out. Same with ben.

And even if Jess, Whit, and Em, and such all accept me, it is still different, they have the past, the memories, and they are always together. I have to casually slip the idea of inviting me, or of me bothering if i want to do something. And it is their grade as the sect. And Maria, laura, and Rachel have their little group...its just, really sad at times. I mean, i use to have aim. Then there was me and bren, and even louie and phil as gamers, adn jokers, and we where all around during PMD, and we could relate. Or i use to have clint and scott, with all the jokes and such, or even gaia with my friends there. But now...I got some stuff here and there, and am really close to people, but in short random bursts. But not as often as i wish. No longer do i have those friends that i am known for talking to every class, but i am struggling to just get some attention with some smaller friends like Kim or Sarah Van oss(God, i love her name so much...), or Christy. And just wanting to feel as if i belong.

And from this i start over doing things. I engross myself in things time to time, letting obsession or books rule my life. Or i overextend, trying to associate with people, acting too romantic, or too friendly, or too annoying. And i piss people off. And from that i feel worse. Causing me to go back to doing whatever it was in a dreadful cycle.

And then i try to change, try to stop, but i make myself worse in the end, or hate myself for going against everything i base myself on, just to be accepted. And hate what i am.

God. I miss bren. I miss Scott. I miss clint.

I talked to scott about an hour only, but it felt so accepted, so right. Same with my cousin kelsey. There was no forcedness. I was not trying to overexert to feel accepted. It is natural, i miss that.

Bah, sometimes i just wish i knew where i belonged. I wish i knew exactly what everyone felt bout me and where i stand.

And man, I really despise posting this. Because i bet someone will be hurt. Or comment on how they care, then i will feel crappy for making them guilty, or i will feel like an idiot for overthinking things and causing this. Hell. The whole reason i am posting this is a selfish pleasure.

Though that is a bit of a lie, there is the part of me that likes people reading, that gives me a small glee. Bah, stupid confusing self. Man. I don't know where i stand. I don't know my morals. I don't really know what i truly like or care for. I am not sure which friends are really my friends. Don't know my opinions. I don't know where i want to go for the future...

God. I don't know anything. I am so damn lost in this life...Bah.

Live life to its fullest. Live with no regrets. Go with the flow. My philosophy has not changed. And it has worked so far. I will continue like that...

BAH

Nothing. At. All. Assembly was a bore. Feeling out of it. Kings island will do me good tommorow. Been falling into a wierd slump. It will fix that.

BAh

Got sora, been feeling odd. Its all been sureal. Everything, all my actions, most anything, it is as if someone else is doing it, and i am just watching it all. So strange. I say not to do something, body acts independently. I try to avoid something, it goes on. I think one thing, say another. Odd odd odd.

Also no One piece next friday D: so pre depression warning.

er.

Nothing really happened...Uhm, working on 100%ing days. I will have everything in about a week i do believe.

Somethin i been meanin to say

And i keep forgetting. oh well. So got cosplay, Whitney was pure win as usual and went beyond the impossible and kicked reason to the curb. She went as a teacher on teacher day alright, she went as mcgonagal(sp?) from Harry potter. It was epic.

And just so you all know. I am only 3 missions away from compeleting Day's story mode >.>

Oh yeh, forgot to blog

Nothin happened today. Got facebook is all really. So ya, you can message me or do farmville crap with me now, and waht not.

Holy shit! Caught up!

I am now down to only whatever new things i get. I am actually caught up. Woot!

And uhm, halfway through Days. I think.

Oh. Laura is now in my study hall. Figured it out when she told me she had madaffer, and i then said that we had it...she didn't realize we had same study hall till study hall. T'was fun, we talked, goofed, planned torture for miguel, and other such things. Looks like things are back to normal with us. And this right here probably jinxed the lack of animosity between us.

And Recon=fail. I hate you recon.

Not much.

Uhm. I dunno. Nothing big happening around here. And such, uhm. Lets do dates.

Happy three days me and Days.

Happy 98 days in >.>

Uhm, happy 7 months, to steal emily the joy of posting that xD

9 days till kh

Happy 3 day anniversry of your Epic Fail Nintendo!

Uhm, yeh, thats all.

Nothing much to report

Been working my ass off on homework, down to five things tonight, and a good bit tommorow. Need to start doing these Do-a-part-a-day things >.> And uhm. Playing about like 6 hours of Days so far. On day 75 or so. Finishing up a mission and getting bro, then work.

Lot to report won't say much though.

We had a speaker, he was brilliant, agree on most of what he said. And Meds kicked in halfway, making it better xD

Mom is being a bitch. I haven't spent any money in 3 weeks, lost 1 week pay, should have had enough for Days, but no, she is keeping track, so i have none, and am in a $50 hole. Fuck, gonna have to borrow for Kings Island, if i can go, and by the end of this, i will have no cash for Sugoi. This is annoying me. She is being bitchy.

And other stuff happened, none of any importance.

And i did some homework, rather than save it all. Sooooooo. I go play Days now 8DDDDDDDDD

Uhm

Forgot to blog early. Dunno not much to talk about..

Oh.

NOT EVEN A DAY LEFT D:::::::::::::

Ugh... What the hell.

So my mom was beign a bitch again. I ended up telling dad i wanted out of deal, and then i broke. I had no idea where i was, who i was, and i was, i was almost in tears if not in tears. I just was insane.

And i realized how horrible i have gotten. I can't talk to people like i use to. Taylor and i don't see each other enough to talk anymore. Bren does not even talk to me...Scott, eh. I just am going insane, reached my threshhold and broke completly. Oh well.

And then mom is saying i have no money owed to me, when i was even after she did sugoi reg, like 3 weeks ago. I need to figure this out.

LAte

So was hanging with Dad at grandmas, bakc, nothing happened today. Found out 60 dollar cards are being reprinted. Yay -_- Now i get to deal with noobs dropping that on me and pwning me -_-

OH BIG NEWS. I FINISHED ATLAS SHRUGGED. It was so brilliant, the characters are so real, and detailed, better than real people...its so god damn brilliant.

Nothing to report

Uhm, so nothing to report. Uhm, 5 days till Days. Uhm. Off meds today. Wee hunger.

Dad is back. cool.

Okay. Crap, good bit of a too do list.

Chem: Wtch 90 minute video, and answer questions. Will BS.
Do something with scientific method about salt, it is rather easy, but tedious.

Math: lets see, baotu 7 sections of shit *headdesk*

Intro to comp: One sheet

Spanish: nothing

English: A day to day activity, so no worries.

Social studies: Vocab i forgot to do -_-

Math is my big killer. I may just skip notes, take the points off there

God, everything is going fast as hell, time is slipping away. It is dissappearing before i know it. Daaaaaaaaaaaamn. There is so little entertaining go on too. Ugh. Stuff needs to change.

And s'okay. Deal is people are all going to halloween hunt or what not homecoming day with mo, figure out your rides, yada yada. But my issue is i already said i would pay my way in to mum and dad. So that puts me from potential 175 to a potential 125 of sugoi money. I need to save lunch money and such too...

Sigh. Need to do work... *breathes in and out* Hmm.

Oh, getting annoyed by Rachels newfound hatred of taylor -_-

Oh, oh, its cool. Michelle Malachovich (super speeling error)rides my bus in the morning. I totally am making it my job to poke her.

And Kelly made a facebook group dedicated to making me lose. I think. And she bought me. I need to get facebook back >.<

And. Uhm. Bro is playing KH now. He fails xD

Yeh, there may be more. But i am too lazy to think. So ciao.

Edit: Okay, forgot to mention epic hilariousness. So after last nights depressing finale of warehouse season 1 i had an idea. And had Emily and me wear thimbles to freak out whitney xD it was funny, she was scared, then like "i want one!" and i gave her mine.

Fuck, way more behind than i thought.

Apparently two more chem stuff due before, that he did not fucking mention >.< and i thought where not due yet. Then like 4 parts math. God damnit not having study hall to work is fucking ruining me. God fucking son of a bitch. I don't care about those damn iep tests. I am so telling her to fuck off. Tommorows wendsday. I am assuming we are done. Going to lunch, then working my ass off in study hall.

Bah, i had stuff to say and forgot

Hrm. Not much. Got to catch up with work.

And the spark has left...me and dissidia aint as close now. Sigh. Its understandable, i did too much, and now i am waiting for days.

got alex into neon genesis, muhahaha.

Uhm. I realize that at different points of day different mindsets happen. Like early on i want to be a goof and romantic. Lunch and 4th i am out of it. 5 is all my computer electronic and science side. 2nd makes me think of games. 7th my mind wonders to perverted thoughts occasionaly and meds wear off.

Though 7 is determined to kill my ability to think pervertedly. I mean i have Alexa there *shivers* She looks so mannish now. Then i have Tanya raygor, ew, russian aids. And then tanya wore a damn skirt while sitting in front of me, basically showing there the whole time and its like "oh god, evil, must not look, but you must look" like an injury or something. T_T. Then i have megan walker *vomits* Then the other girls are either ugly, or people who i find pretty but not hot. Like kim, christy sarah van oss (yes, i typed the whole name, yes, i love her last name >.>), and this one foreign exchange girl Stella.

Oh. And i most likely will never say this again, but I found out that a sneeze can actually sound cute, and not be from a pet like a cat or dog. Today stella did this really small one, that did not even seem like a sneeze. It was something that sounded cute, like if a cat or dog sneezes... Cept pugs. Pugs sneeze badass. Because pugs are made of cool.

And uhm. I made this epic Alice thing with Chase and another guy. A lemur and penguin start far away, then the lemur moves to the penguin, the penguin turns its head and body, so the head is 90 degrees away then it slowly turns back. The lemur extends his arm, then turns and the penguins body falls to the water and the head does and arc and flies to the screen getting knocked off (this was a bit difficult to do, multiple Do together commands and what not.). Then the lemur moves its arm up and yells "PWNED FOR SPARTA!". Then this loops thrice, which is random moving and turning and random body parts flying xD Then the lemur is standing facing the right of screen. it then moves that and and sinks under the water dissapearing. We where gonna make a T-rex then pop up from under water, but did not have time. So a random t-rex is there.

Also someone help me figure out what the fuck is going on homecoming weekend. Cause it started as i wasn't going nad only a few others where not going. So it was gonna be a party at my place was gonna happen, then molly is coming down so now we are doing something else. and then ria and laura now are able to do stuff, so i am all confused.